


I'll Find The Cure In Your Eyes

by SparklingDarkAngel



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/F, Mayskye - Freeform, early season two
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-24
Updated: 2018-03-26
Packaged: 2018-04-06 00:54:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 19,471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4201695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SparklingDarkAngel/pseuds/SparklingDarkAngel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a mission goes south, Melinda May wakes up unable to remember anything since Bahrain. Skye makes it her personal mission to take care of her while she's recovering.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Missing Memories

**Author's Note:**

> So for awhile, I've only been on fanfiction.net, but I've been using this sight more so now I am in the slow process of moving my stories from there to here. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoy this one!

Melinda's eyes shot open in panic. They scanned the room quickly. The only familiar thing they could find was Coulson, who was dozing off in a chair next to her. She blinked in confusion as she pushed herself into a sitting position. At the sound of her movements, Coulson jerked awake. "Melinda!" he exclaimed. "Thank goodness you're finally awake."

"Where am I?" Melinda asked. The words felt like sandpaper against her dry throat. 

"The Playground," Coulson answered. 

Melinda racked her brain, but she had no memory of a base called 'The Playground'. "What happened? How did I get here?"

"You went on a mission that ended badly. Simmons said that you might be experiencing some memory loss. What's the last thing you remember?"

The world could be ending, and Coulson would still be calm. Though it could be infuriating at times, right now it was reassuring. Focusing on his voice was the only thing keeping Melinda from panicking as she realized just how hazy her memory was. "I've only got bits and pieces of getting a divorce and withdrawing from active duty, but the last clear thing I can remember is you telling me to let the girl go," she said finally. 

A look of surprise broke out over Coulson's usually calm face. His eyes widened, and his lips parted slightly. A sense of dread settled into Melinda's stomach as she carefully observed him. "Melinda, that was seven years ago," he said. 

"No," Melinda responded automatically. "That can't be right."

Coulson gently touched her hand, and Melinda was reminded of a certain child that she was trying very hard not to think about. She flinched away, ignoring the hurt on his face. Instead, she focused on her breathing, which was quickly growing out of control. 

"You went on a mission with Agent Morse to find a rogue Hydra member when you were shot with a device that causes temporary memory loss, according to Simmons," Coulson explained gently. 

"How temporary?" Melinda demanded. 

"Unfortunately, we have no way of knowing for sure. Simmons said it should only be a few weeks," Coulson answered. 

Melinda swallowed hard. Her heart rate was increasing, and she found herself powerless to control it. Her breaths came in faster until she was hyperventilating. She wrapped her arms tightly around her stomach, hoping to provide herself some form of comfort as her body spiraled out of control. 

"Melinda, you need to calm down," she could hear Coulson saying. "Breathe deeply."

"I can't," she choked out. Melinda brought her knees to her chest and buried her head. It was all too much. 

"I know that you're disoriented and overwhelmed, but you can do this," Coulson said, encouragingly. He sat with her in silence as she fought to get her panic under control. When she could breathe normally again, she forced herself to look into Coulson's eyes. 

"That's never happened to me before," Melinda said. 

Coulson smiled kindly. Something was different about it, and that scared Melinda, because the man in front of her may no longer be the man she knew. A lot could happen to a person in seven years, especially in their line of work, and people could change. 

"I would be more surprised if you didn't panic," Coulson replied calmly. "This is a lot to take in for anybody. Even you."

"Has it really been seven years?" she asked with a shaky voice. 

"I'm afraid so."

The pair sat in silence for a moment. Melinda twirled the soft bed sheet around in her fingers as she scanned the room again. She appeared to be in some kind of quarantine box, except the door was open so she must not be that badly off. With a sigh, she leaned back and closed her eyes. "So, what's happened in the past seven years?" she asked, dreading the answer. Her heart was beginning to pound again, and she could feel bile rising in the back of her throat. She considered telling Coulson to wait to tell her, but the uncertainty was eating her alive. She needed to know, even if it completely overwhelmed her. 

"Quite a lot, actually," Coulson replied, seemingly oblivious to her distress. "You've got a lot to catch up on."

Xxx

"What happened to May?"

Upon Skye's arrival in the almost empty lab, Jemma looked up from her work and smiled warmly at her friend. "How much did they tell you?" she asked. 

Skye crossed the room to lean across the counter from Jemma. "I ran into Bobbi. She told me that May got hit with some weird Hydra disc and lost her memory," she explained. "She seemed pretty worried, but she said that Coulson was with her."

"That's good," Jemma replied, nodding. "She'll need someone to explain what's happening when she wakes up."

"And what is happening?" Skye questioned. 

Jemma gestured to the metal disc in front of her. The underside of it was covered in blood and barbs and wires. Tentatively, Skye reached out to touch the hydra symbol on the top of it. The steel was cold, and she quickly withdrew her hand. "What is it?" she asked. 

"It's similar to what Hydra was using to disintegrate people, except this is designed to send out electrical impulses that cause memory loss. Luckily for us, the design is still being perfected, and the effects are only temporary," Jemma explained. "Coulson asked me to look at it to make sure, and it's the same model. May should make a full recovery in a few weeks."

Skye breathed a sigh of relief and slumped against the counter. She checked her heart monitor and was unsurprised to find that her pulse was high. After a few deep breaths, she brought it back down again. Now that she knew her SO was okay, she could relax. 

"May also shouldn't completely lose her memory. Only a good chunk of it will be gone. She probably won't remember who we are," Jemma added. 

Skye swallowed a lump in her throat and nodded. "That's alright. Because she'll get it back. Right?"

"Right," Jemma assured her. "I know this will be tough, but May's our friend, and we have to help her."

"Right, of course," Skye replied absentmindedly, nodding to herself. Her thoughts were back with May, wondering if she was hurt or frightened, or if she was even awake. What was the last thing she remembered?

Skye started when the door opened, pulling her out of her thoughts. She turned to see Coulson standing in the doorway looking worse for wear. Though his expression always remained neutral, his eyes gave his worry away. 

"Is she alright?" Skye asked. 

Coulson nodded as he walked closer. "She just woke up a short while ago with no memory of anything since what happened in Bahrain seven years ago. I filled her in. Now, she needs to rest."

Skye and Jemma nodded in unison and exchanged looks of relief. "Thank you for the update, sir," Jemma replied. 

"Can I go see her?" Skye asked. 

"Not now," Coulson answered gently. 

Skye bit back her disappointment and nodded. "Just tell me that she really is alright."

"Of course. She's May, after all."

Skye remained unconvinced, but she said nothing as the Director excused himself and left the lab. She ran her fingers through her hair and sighed. It was shaping up to be a very rough day, and her muscles ached as proof. She knew she should leave it, but she couldn't shake the feeling that something was very wrong. She knew Coulson, and his eyes suggested that he was lying. 

"I'm going to check on her anyways," Skye decided. 

"Are you sure that's wise? May is probably very distressed, and you wouldn't want to make it worse."

"I'm sure," Skye answered with conviction. "She needs me."

"Skye, I get that the two of you are close now, but she needs rest," Jemma replied firmly. 

With a sigh of defeat, Skye nodded. "You're probably right."

Xxx

Melinda awoke next in a tangle of limbs and sheets, unable to determine where she began. As hard as she tried, she couldn't slow her breathing as she fought against the blanket wrapped around her legs. She kicked it free and brought her knees up to her chest. She wrapped her arms tightly around them and buried her head, hoping to create some sort of shell to protect her from the outside world. As she shivered, she knew that it wasn't the outside world that she needed to worry about, but it was all she could do. 

The voice of Katya was still echoing inside her head, even after awakening from her nightmare. Melinda couldn't erase the child's eyes from her mind; couldn't un-see that outstretched hand as the girl advanced towards her. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut, but it didn't matter. The girl was still there. 

Melinda jumped at the sound of the door opening. Her eyes flew up to meet a pair of unfamiliar ones, yet as Melinda stared, she could sense that she knew this girl. She went over what Coulson had told her, trying to put a name to the face. 

"I'm sorry," the other women began. "I probably shouldn't have come, but I had to see that you were alright."

Something about her stance reminded Melinda of herself. She held the other women's gaze for a moment, analyzing her. "I am," she finally answered. 

The other agent nodded awkwardly and turned to leave. "Right. I'll just go."

"You're Skye, aren't you?" Melinda asked. 

She paused for a second before turning back. "How did you know that?" she asked. 

"Coulson said I was training someone named Skye. You seemed like the type," Melinda answered. "Besides, it felt right."

Skye continued to stand in the doorway, wringing her hands. Her discomfort was written plainly across her face. Some inexplicable part of Melinda yearned for her. Deciding that it must be her subconscious remembering the girl in front of her, she shifted to her right and patted the space next to her on the bed. "Sit with me."

A look of relief washed over Skye's face as she joined her. Already, Melinda was beginning to feel more relaxed. She could feel her heart in her rib cage easing up, and her breaths came in slow and steady. Leaning back in the bed, she could observe Skye's face as the other agent did the same. 

"I'm glad you came," Melinda said, breaking the silence. 

"Me too," Skye replied. "And I'm glad that my presence didn't just freak you out more."

Melinda huffed at her response. "I may be disoriented and confused right now, but I know that I know you."

If Skye replied, Melinda didn't hear it because her eyelids were growing heavy, and her mind was shutting down. She tried to fight off the oncoming blackness for a few seconds, but sleep took exhausted body quickly as she collapsed onto her pillow. 

Xxx

With an affectionate smile, Skye brushed the hair out of May's face. Her insides felt warm at other agent's trust in her. For the first time in a while, Skye felt truly happy. 

She hadn't meant to come down here, but as her thoughts wandered to May, so did her feet. By the time she had accidentally reached May's door a third time, she knew that she was never going to rest if she didn't check on her. 

It had come as a surprise when May trusted her. Skye didn't know what she was expecting, but it wasn't the other women looking so vulnerable and scared. Now that she was asleep, her face took on a more peaceful look that made Skye's stomach tighten. 

"Sleep well, May," Skye whispered as she stood to leave. 

It had never been harder for her to turn her back on May. 

Once she was back wandering the halls, Skye felt like it was finally safe to breathe. Everything was going to be okay, or at least May would be. The thought of something happening to May froze Skye's blood with fear. She cared too much about her SO to see her hurt. 

When Skye ended up at her bunk, she smiled to herself. Was this her body's was of telling her that she needed sleep? If it was, she wasn't going to complain. She was exhausted, and a quick power nap to help her get through the rest of the afternoon could only help. 

Skye was about to crash onto her inviting bed when she heard a voice coming from her doorway. "Skye? Did you see her?"

She couldn't hide the smile as she turned to face her friend, who was leaning against her doorway. "Yes, Jemma. I don't know how, but it just sorta happened."

Jemma laughed and rolled her eyes. "Of course you did. Is she alright?"

"I think she is," Skye answered honestly. 

"Well, you look tired," Jemma replied. "I'll let you sleep."

With her friend gone, Skye collapsed onto her bed and buried her face into her pillow. It didn't take long before she could feel herself drifting off.


	2. Brown Eyes

After a few minutes of turning circles, Melinda finally admitted to herself that she was lost. It had only been a day since she had woken up with seven years gone from her memory, but she was already restless and feeling the need to be doing something; anything. 

With a sigh, she ran her hands over her face and leaned against the wall. She doubted that she could even get back to the room she was sleeping in by now. The Playground was much bigger than she had imagined, although she didn't know why she expected that S.H.I.E.L.D.'s main base be any smaller. It wasn't the Hub, but it still felt big enough to swallow Melinda whole. 

"May?" an unfamiliar voice asked. 

Melinda turned to the sound, facing a young agent, probably a scientist by the look of her. The other agent was looking at her in concern. Something about the expression looked familiar. 

"Hello. Sorry, you are?"

"Simmons," the other agent answered. "Jemma Simmons."

"Jemma," Melinda said, testing the name out. It felt odd; almost as if it belonged. "We're friends, right?"

"Yes, we are," Jemma replied, her eyes lighting up. "I didn't expect you to be up so soon. Is everything alright?"

"Yes, I was just looking for Coulson. Can you tell me where his office is?"

"Sure. Just go down that hallway to the bigger room then take the stairs up," she answered. "I had difficulty finding things too for the first few days."

"Thank you," Melinda responded. 

The two agents parted ways, and Melinda followed Jemma's instructions to the stairs. She paused at the bottom, listening for voices. When she heard nothing, she climbed. The door was open, so Melinda knocked on the doorway. 

Coulson looked up from his desk, his expression changing to one of surprise when he saw her. "Melinda!" he exclaimed. "What are you doing up?"

"I wanted to talk to you," Melinda answered, stepping further into the room. "Were you just staring at your desk?"

"That's a long story," he said simply, shifting papers to cover what he had been staring at. "What is it you wanted to talk to me about."

"I think it would be best if I was kept off active duty until my memory comes back," she said. 

"Alright," Coulson responded. "Just take it easy until you remember."

Melinda thanked him and left his office, hoping that she wouldn't get lost as she tried to find a place to train. For some reason, punching a sand bag always helped to clear her mind. It would also help her get rid of her restless energy.

Instead of thinking about it, she let her feet guide her. As she walked, she tried to focus on something else, hoping that muscle memory would kick in. Her thoughts wandered towards the agent Skye who had visited her yesterday. She tried to remember anything she could about her, but nothing came to mind. 

When Melinda saw the punching bag hanging in the large room in front of her, she sighed with relief. Pushing the other girl from her mind, she approached the bag. She threw an experimental punch, surprised to find that it felt different. She closed her eyes, clearing her mind and letting her fist go where it wanted. It struck the bag more confidently, rocking it back and forth. Melinda opened her eyes and threw another punch, watching her fist move. 

Minutes passed as Melinda became familiar with her new fighting style. It seemed that a lot had changed within her in seven years. She just wished she could remember it. 

Xxx

"Can't I just kill Ward?" Skye grumbled as she watched Jemma work on the disc that had taken May's memories. 

"There's not a lot of people here who would blame you," Jemma responded. "Did he at least give you anything useful?"

"Not today," Skye groaned. "He just keeps going on and on about building trust or some nonsense."

"That'll never happen," Jemma commented. She pulled a piece of metal off the disk and stuck it under a microscope. "If I can just figure out how this works, I might be able to restore May's memory faster."

"How?" Skye questioned. 

Jemma sighed, pulling away to face Skye. "I have no idea, but I have to do something. I just feel so helpless watching her."

Skye nodded in agreement. "Have you seen her yet?"

"This morning," Jemma answered. "She had gotten lost looking for Coulson's office."

The pair fell into silence as Jemma continued to dissect bloody bits of wire and metal. Although her touch was gentle, something about her movements seemed more and more agitated as time passed. With everything that was going on, tensions were high. She pulled at a wire, and when it wouldn't come loose she tugged harder, snapping it. With a frustrated sigh, she set the disk down. 

"Do you ever just get overwhelmed by everything?" Jemma asked, pinching the bridge of her nose. 

"All the time," Skye agreed. "Maybe you should take a break."

"After being undercover in HYDRA, this is a break."

"I mean a real break," Skye said. "One where you don't work. Even if it's just for a few hours."

"Work is the best thing for me," Jemma argued. "I just need to keep my mind off everything or I feel like I might explode."

Skye only nodded in response. She was worried for her friend, but she understood where Jemma was coming from. She would give anything right now for a distraction, which was why she was in the lab with the other agent. 

If Ward wasn't in the picture, Skye thought everything might be easier for her to handle. Every time she talked to him, it seemed to take longer to bring her pulse back down. Her nerves were fraying, and she was afraid of snapping. 

"Well, just promise me that you'll take care of yourself, alright Jemma?" Skye asked, meeting her friend's eyes. 

"I promise," Jemma replied, smiling slightly.

"Coulson wanted to see me now, but let me know if you find anything that could help May," Skye said, pulling herself away from the counter. 

"Will do," Jemma called out as Skye started to walk away. 

As her footsteps echoed through the empty halls, Skye focused on her breathing, just as May taught her. She didn't need to check the monitor around her wrist to know that her pulse was high. Navigating her way to Coulson's office, Skye slowed her breathing to match her steps. Maybe if she focused on that hard enough, she could forget about everything else. 

Xxx

Covered in a thin layer of sweat, Melinda finally pulled herself away from the punching bag. The muscles in her arms protested as she pulled her hair back out of her face. Though she ached, her mind was finally at peace. Even if it was only temporary, it had been worth the extensive exercise. 

If she could keep her mind clear, finding her bunk should be easy. Luckily, her muscle memory wasn't gone. She approached the door, checking to make sure the halls were empty. Even the idea of facing people exhausted her more than she already was. Once she confirmed they were clear, she began to wander, letting her feet guide her. 

Instinctively, Melinda tried to match her breathing with the sound of her footsteps. It gave her something to focus on besides where she was going, distracting her mind for long enough to allow her feet to find where she was going. Although she had never done before that she could remember, it felt so natural that she didn't even think to question it. Absently, she wondered if this was something she had taught Skye. 

The other agent had been on her mind all day. Something about her intrigued Melinda. Skye looked at her with undisguised trust and affection. It was rare to see a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent such as her with their emotions worn so close to the surface. It was refreshing in a way. In the few minutes Melinda had spent with her, she already felt like she knew her. 

As she turned the corner, she nearly crashed into the agent she had just been thinking about. "S-sorry," Melinda stuttered awkwardly. 

"May!" Skye exclaimed. "Good to see you."

"You too," Melinda replied, meeting the other's brown eyes. They gazed up at her with shimmering fondness that made her heart skip in her chest. 

"What have you been doing?" Skye asked, trying to keep the conversation flowing. 

"Just training," she answered. 

Skye's eyes widened incredulously as she asked, "Doesn't anybody take a break around here?"

"With all that's going on?" Melinda asked, raising an eyebrow. 

The other agent laughed slightly, causing those brown eyes to light up. "I suppose you're right. Still, don't burn yourself out. Goodness, I'm starting to feel like the team mom."

Melinda laughed with her. "You don't need to be worried about me."

"Right," Skye replied. "Well, I'm just on my way to see Coulson, so I guess I'll see you around."

Melinda nodded, passing the other agent as she continued to look for her bunk. She hadn't gotten far before she turned around and called out, "Skye?"

The other agent turned, meeting Melinda's eyes with curiosity. "Is Coulson alright?" Melinda asked. 

The brown eyes darkened slightly as Skye nodded and replied, "He's fine."

Melinda had been trained to spot a liar, and while Skye was good, Melinda could see the lie in her eyes. She decided to ignore it for now, turning back to the open hallway in front of her. For a second, she considered asking Skye for directions, but this was something she needed to do by herself. 

Her feet began to move as if of their own free will. In order to keep her mind distracted, she focused on that pair of brown eyes that were already seared onto her brain. They were a gorgeous color, warm and bright as if hiding their own personal sun. Melinda wouldn't be surprised if they were with the way they glowed. 

Within a minute, Melinda found herself in a doorway, staring into a room. She could tell the instant she stepped inside that the bunk belonged to her. The room felt familiar in the way home does. She smiled to herself, almost giddy with relief. As she eyed her bed, she considered taking a break, but she decided against it, searching her drawer instead. She needed to learn as much about herself as possible. 

Xxx

As Skye climbed the steps to Coulson's office, her mood was much lighter than it had been earlier. Knowing that May was alright provided her with more relief than she had expected. Worry for her S.O. had been eating away at her, fraying her nerves. Seeing her had lifted a weight Skye didn't know she was carrying. 

She invited herself into the office, closing the door behind her and sitting across from Coulson as he traced something with his finger. Skye glanced down at the carving on his desk. "Is it getting worse?"

"Yes," Coulson replied with surprising honesty. "And now that May's... Well, you're the only person who knows now."

"Any more?" Skye asked. 

Coulson pressed a button on his remote, and a screen retracted into the ceiling, revealing a wall full of carvings. They stretched across the entire room, filling it with their ominous message. 

"Any idea what it means?" Coulson asked hopefully. 

"Not yet," Skye admitted. "I've been searching all sorts of maps, and nothing seems to match."

"Well, keep digging," he instructed, leaning back in his chair. His voice was steady, but the shadows under his eyes revealed just how stressed he was. "Ward give you anything?"

"Just false promises," Skye muttered bitterly. Her eyes continued to absorb the alien writing on the wall. She racked her brain, trying to come up with any solution. She was starting to believe that there wasn't one. 

"Have you seen May?" Coulson asked, pulling Skye out of her contemplating. 

"Yes. She's doing well," Skye answered. "I'm going to keep an eye on her though."

"I'm glad to hear that," Coulson replied. His eyes took on a far away look as he presumably was remembering something. "This May isn't as strong as she says she is. Just remember that."

"You said that she couldn't remember anything since Bahrain?" Skye questioned. When Coulson nodded, she continued. "You also said that May lost herself in Bahrain."

Coulson's sad eyes met hers as he nodded again. "I don't know everything that happened, and I might never know, but she's taken a strong liking to you. She may open up to you."

"I hope so," Skye said softly. "I'll take care of her, Coulson. You don't have to worry."

"I won't," Coulson replied. Skye couldn't tell if he was lying or not based on his calm expression. "I know that you'll take care of her the way she's taken care of you."

Skye's thoughts drifted back to their meeting in the hallway. Though May had seemed off, she was still the same person Skye had met, just missing pieces here and there. It worried her that her S.O. was training at a time like this, but that was just how she was. May would pull through, and Skye would be there to make sure of that. 

"We take care of each other," Skye answered. 

Coulson smiled, and for a moment, the stress was gone from his face, and everything was okay.


	3. The Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Chapter may contain triggers for self harm.

In the darkness and silence of her own bunk, Melinda tossed and turned, tangling herself with the sheets. Her eyes squeezed tighter as she threw her arms out to fend off imaginary attackers. The nightmare held her tightly in it's grip. Her breathing came faster as she saw the same image over and over in her mind: Katya, her chest filled with bullet holes, arm outstretched. 

Finally, mercifully, she woke. Her eyes blinked fast as she tried to remember where she was. Her fists clenched around the sheets, reminding her that she was far away from Bahrain. As her mind caught up, it suddenly hit her that she was too far; that she was missing seven years of her life. 

All at once, everything she had tried to bury felt like it was going to bury her. Melinda choked out a sob as she stumbled out of bed. She had no idea where she was going. All she knew was that she had to get away. She tripped over herself in her rush, hitting the floor hard. 

Melinda could no longer hold back the sobs. She curled into a ball on the floor and buried her head with her knees. She bit down on her lip, desperately trying to quiet herself, but the cries kept coming. Her whole body shook as she wrapped her arms tighter around herself. 

No matter what she did, she couldn't get Katya's face out of her head. She could still feel her fingers on the trigger, and she could still hear the sound of the bullet rushing through the air, straight into her flesh. She could still feel the child's blood clinging to her hands as she held her lifeless body, her hands absently stroking her hair. Katya may have been a monster, but she was still a child, and Melinda killed her. No matter how hard she tried, she was never going to escape from that. 

She bit into her hand, hoping to quiet her cries. Her teeth dug hard into her soft flesh. It hurt, but at the same time, it was a relief. Melinda bit down harder, hoping to erase her mental pain with the physical pain.

Once she tasted copper, she yanked her hand away. She stared down at it in surprise. Etched into her skin were bright red teeth marks. She quickly wiped the blood off onto her shirt, then turned the fabric to her wet cheeks. The tears had stopped, much to Melinda's relief. Her whole body had calmed, subdued by the pain. 

Experimentally, she gently touched the bite marks on her hand. They stung, but when she dug her nails into them, she felt more relief than she did pain. Her breathing slowed, and her heart rate steadied itself as she pressed harder. 

As soon as she realized what she was doing, shame set in. Her cheeks grew hot as she stared down at the mess of nail marks she had made on her hand. Her stomach twisted up as she tried to wipe them away. She needed to hide the mess that she had become, but she had no idea where to look for a bathroom. Another tear trickled down her cheek as her body threatened to panic again. 

She tried to stand, but in the darkness and unfamiliarity, she walked straight into the wall. She grunted as she slid down it, curling up on the floor once again and letting her sobs take over. 

XXX

Skye couldn't remember the last time she had gotten a good night's sleep. Everything that was happening kept dancing around in her mind, making it impossible to even close her eyes. HYDRA, Ward, her father, Coulson's carvings, the alien drug- all of it was adding up to something she couldn't figure out. She had no choice but to work her body into exhaustion until she passed out most nights. Luckily, no one was ever awake to judge her for it. 

She had learned from May that punching a sand bag was a quick way to clear her mind. Every night, she snuck down to train, and while it was beginning to take its toll on her body, at least she was able to eventually sleep. 

As she walked down her usual nightly path, Skye heard a thud. She froze, straining her ears towards the sound. She walked closer to where she thought it was coming from, which was a door to somebody's bunk. As she pressed her ear to the door, she could hear someone crying on the other side. 

Her heart ached as she reached for the knob, but as her fingers touched the door, she hesitated. As tired as she was, she couldn't remember who's bunk this was, and she didn't know if she would help or only make it worse. The sobs only increased in volume as she waited. Before she could change her mind, Skye turned the knob and quietly entered. 

Sitting against the wall was her S.O., curled into herself. May's body shook, even as she tried to still herself. She looked up, wiping tears from her cheeks as she did so. Her bloodshot eyes met Skye's with such raw pleading that Skye felt as if the breath had been knocked out of her. 

"Skye?" May asked weakly, her voice faltering. 

Wordlessly, Skye crossed the room and sat next to May. She threw her arm over the other agent and pulled her close. May curled into her, hiding her face. For a few minutes, the two sat in the dark, with Skye holding May as her sobs turned to silence. 

"Did I wake you?" May finally asked, her voice weak with exhaustion. 

"Do I look like I sleep?" Skye returned gently. "I was just on my way to train when I heard you."

May looked up, meeting Skye's eyes with her uncharacteristically vulnerable ones. "At this hour?"

"I can't sleep, and my mind needs it," Skye replied. 

May pulled herself away from Skye's arm sheepishly. "I don't know what's happening to me," she admitted. 

"You've been through a lot," Skye answered gently. "Any normal person would break under so much stress."

"I know this was seven years ago, but to me it feels like just days ago," May said. 

Skye's eyes widened as she realized what May was talking about. "It was just days ago as far as your mind is concerned," she replied.

"I couldn't save her," May admitted miserably. 

"You can't save everyone," Skye reassured her. "I've been an agent long enough to know."

May remained silent, staring down at her hands. Her eyes were full of self-hatred. Gently, Skye reached out and took one of her hands in her own. "I know you're not okay," she continued. "But you're going to be."

"I keep forgetting that you know me better than I know myself," May replied almost bitterly. "I don't even know you."

"But you will," Skye said firmly. "I know this is crazy, but you will remember soon. You'll get through this."

"You probably want her back," the other agent replied. This time, her voice was unmistakably bitter. 

"What?" Skye asked, wrinkling her brow in confusion. 

"Your Agent May."

"Hey, you are still her," Skye said, squeezing May's hand. "You're still the same, just confused and scared, which is completely understandable."

May met her eyes again. Hope lit them, and they began to look like hers again. "I may not remember you, but I would like to," she said. "If you're not going to sleep, maybe you could tell me about yourself?"

XXX

After awhile, the agents moved onto Melinda's bed, leaning against opposite walls. As Skye's voice droned on, Melinda's mind began to relax. She no longer saw the face of Katya. Instead, Skye's stories came to life inside her head. 

"And then Ward yanked the parachute and the antiserum out of Fitz's hands and jumps out of the plane after her."

The image of the agent she met (or re-met) this morning falling through the air towards her death worried her, but she knew how that story ended. She smiled to herself, admiring her fellow agent's bravery. "He seems like a good agent," she commented. 

Skye's smile faltered, and her eyes moved down to her hands which were clasped in her lap. "I thought so too," she said softly. 

"What happened?" Melinda asked, her eyes narrowing in worry. 

"Coulson told you about HYDRA, right?" Skye asked. 

Melinda nodded in response. 

"Yeah, well, he was HYDRA," Skye continued bitterly.

"I'm so sorry," Melinda replied, leaning forward to touch Skye's hand. 

"He loved me," she admitted, eyes wide with disgust. "He's a murderer and a traitor, and he fell in love with me. What does that say about me?"

"Absolutely nothing," Melinda answered firmly. "You're a good person, Skye. I can tell."

"Thanks," Skye whispered. "I just wish he wasn't in our basement."

"He is?" Melinda asked, worry for her friend growing. 

"Yeah. And of course, he'll only talk to me, meaning I have to be the one to go interrogate him."

"Can't Coulson find another way?" Melinda asked. 

"He's tried," Skye answered. "But Romeo's determined to only talk to me."

Deep in Melinda's stomach, feelings of protectiveness settled, causing her to squeeze Skye's hand. She wanted to protect the agent in front of her from all harm, and that included Ward, who she assumed that she knew. She knew that she would do anything to keep Skye safe, and given the intensity of the feeling, she knew that it came from before she lost her memory. Skye was someone she cared for deeply, but she was more than that. She was proof that Bahrain hadn't completely broken her. 

"Anyways, Ward caught up to Jemma, gave her the antiserum, and landed safely in the ocean," Skye continued. "We fished them out, and the antiserum worked. Which was great because then she didn't blow our plane out of the sky."

"I wish I could remember her," Melinda replied. "I wish I could remember the whole team." To Melinda, the team Skye described sounded just like the family she had always wanted. 

Skye's eyelids began to droop. She opened her mouth to continue talking, but yawned instead. Her eyes shut, and her body shifted down on the bed. As soon as her head hit the mattress, her whole body relaxed, giving the appearance of sleep. Given how exhausted she had looked, Melinda didn't doubt that she was asleep. The stress that had been etched into her face seemed to disappear completely. She no longer looked like the agent sworn to protect, instead looking like the friend Melinda wanted to protect herself. 

She shifted into a more comfortable position, closing her own eyes. The other agent's presence was a comfort as she let her mind wander. Instead of returning to her darkest moment in Bahrain, it stayed with Skye. 

XXX

The first thing Skye felt when she woke was exhaustion. It had been a long time since sleep had made her feel better. Every limb protested consciousness. She groaned and searched for a pillow to cover her head with. Her hands hit skin, causing her to startle fully awake. She sat up quickly, staring at the sleeping form of May beside her. 

As what happened last night came rushing back, Skye relaxed. She smiled fondly at the sleeping agent. May's face was relaxed, giving no sign of nightmares. With a sigh, she collapsed back onto the bed. There was so much that she needed to do, but she didn't even have the energy to move. 

Her eyes closed, and in her mind, she could see the lines and dots that made up Coulson's carvings. If it was a map, then she needed to find out where it led to. It was eating away at her, robbing her of rest. For her own health, she needed to unlock its secret. 

She rubbed at her eyes, hoping to scrub the carvings away. It felt as if they had been carved directly onto her eyelids. She couldn't keep herself from obsessing over them. Every time she closed her eyes, they were there. She was beginning to believe that her obsession was worse than Coulson's, and he was the one who kept carving. 

Beside her, May stirred. Skye cracked her eyes open, hoping to find her still asleep. The other agent was sitting up, rubbing her eyes. Skye sighed again, knowing that she would have to move soon. 

"G'morning," May greeted her, sounding amused. 

Skye smiled sheepishly in response. "Good morning to you too," she replied, sleep clinging heavily to her voice. 

"You look like you haven't slept in days," May commented. 

"I feel like it too," Skye groaned. She pushed herself up into a sitting position, leaning her head against the wall. Her heavy eyes closed again, and her mind returned to the carvings. 

"You know that isn't healthy, right?" May asked, concerned. 

"Yes, mother," Skye grumbled. 

May snorted, causing Skye to open her eyes again. The other agent was staring at her fondly, looking no different than she had before she lost her memory. Skye grinned back at her, happy to be able to make her happy. 

"Thank you for last night," May said, changing the subject. 

Skye nodded. "You know, you can call me anytime you need anything, even if it's just to talk. I'm here."

May dropped her eyes, looking slightly embarrassed. "Thank you," she said softly. "I know this must be difficult for you too."

"Between HYDRA and aliens, this is something I can handle. I know you think you're different, but you're really not," Skye told her. "You know, if you're going to be off field duty, maybe you could help me."

"With what?" May asked, looking curious. 

"I'm researching a pattern that is connected to HYDRA and the alien drug, but I'm getting nowhere."

"Alright," Melinda agreed. "And maybe you could fill me in on the alien drug too. Coulson glossed over those details."

"Deal," Skye replied. She stretched her arms, listening to her joints popping. There was no going back to sleep, so she may as well get up.


	4. The Alien Drug

Lines and circles passed before Melinda's eyes. She squinted, trying to focus on the symbols on the screen. As hard as she tried, she couldn't remember seeing anything like them before. They seemed random, meaningless even. 

"What are they?" she asked. "Should I recognize them?"

"I'd be surprised if you did," Skye replied. "As far as I can tell, no one has seen them before."

Melinda nodded, not taking her eyes away from the markings. "Where did you find these?"

Skye hesitated, distracting herself by fiddling with the screen. She zoomed out, staring at the full picture. Still, the lines and circles felt randomly placed. To Melinda's eyes, they didn't make anything. 

"I have a source," Skye answered.

Used to SHIELD's secrets, Melinda simply nodded. "Well whoever it is, that's who you really need to talk to. They might have the rest."

"The rest?" Skye asked. "You think we're missing something."

"I think we have a very small puzzle piece," Melinda confirmed. "Unless it's some sort of alien language," she added, considering the possibility. 

"Alien language," Skye muttered. "I hadn't thought of that. Also never thought that would become a part of my regular conversation."

Melinda nodded in agreement. During the time she couldn't remember, the world had only gotten stranger, and the universe had gotten so much bigger. It still felt unreal, as if everything was one bad nightmare. She supposed that thinking about it that way helped her deal with it. 

"Tell me how it's connected to everything," Melinda requested, hoping it would help her to wrap her head around things. 

Skye sighed heavily, running her hands over her face as she did so. "It's hard to explain. We don't yet have the full picture; just small details. It's a hacker's nightmare."

Melinda glanced over in surprise at that comment. She was constantly being reminded just how little she knew about this person who she felt so close to. 

"We know that HYDRA is chasing this too. We don't know why, and we don't know what they know," Skye explained. "The alien drug Coulson mentioned when injected into a person causes these compulsions to carve these markings. It can also cause them to go kinda nuts."

"How so?" Melinda asked. 

"This one guy, this HYDRA agent, had been researching it. He needed it to save his life. When he finally got it, he injected himself and completely lost it. He kept ranting about the language of the universe or something."

"Sounds like a hallucinogenic," Melinda muttered. 

"Yeah," Skye agreed. "And then there's the carvings. The people carve obsessively, and they don't know what or why. They just can't stop. They carve anywhere they can."

"Like on their desk," Melinda supplied, suddenly remembering Coulson staring down oddly at his desk. "Skye, who is your source?" she asked with new urgency in her voice. 

"Skye," a new voice interrupted. 

Jemma Simmons stood in the doorway, looking concerned. "Coulson wants to see you. Now."

"Alright," Skye replied with a sigh. "I'll mention your ideas to him."

The agent walked out, leaving Melinda alone with Jemma. She smiled awkwardly at the other woman, glancing nervously at the ground. 

"Is this what Skye's been working on?" Jemma asked, approaching the screen. 

"Oh, yes," Melinda answered. "Doesn't seem like she sleeps."

Jemma laughed bitterly as she shut the screen off. "None of us do," she admitted. "Coulson's kept me busy working on new technology, and I am very grateful for the distraction."

Taking a closer look, Melinda could see the dark circles under the agent's eyes. She understood everyone's worry, even if she couldn't remember all the events that led them here. Something big was coming, and everyone could feel it, even Melinda. She could see it in the other agents, from the tension in their muscles to the sleepy, unfocused stares. 

Just then, a blonde agent poked her head into the doorway. "Simmons, Fitz needs you to have a look at something," she announced. 

Melinda didn't miss the slight flinch in Jemma's body at Fitz's name. She recognized it from Skye's story, but she thought that the two of them were friends. With tensions as high as they were, she couldn't help but worry. They couldn't afford to fall apart now. 

"He couldn't even tell me himself," Jemma muttered under her breath. Melinda was certain that she wasn't meant to have heard it, so she ignored it. "I'm heading down to the lab now," she informed the other agent. 

Jemma took her leave reluctantly. As she walked, the other agent watched her in sympathy. Melinda examined her, trying to determine if she knew her. As she did, the agent looked up and blushed. "Sorry," she apologized. "We met a few years ago. My name's Bobbi."

"Melinda," she answered. "Except, you knew that. Sorry."

"You don't have to apologize," Bobbi said. "I know that this must be really confusing." 

"You can say that again."

Bobbi smirked. Her eyes held the same tiredness that everyone's seemed to. "Anyways, we're friends," she continued. "So if you need anything, don't hesitate to ask."

Melinda nodded. "Thank you," she replied. 

"How about I show you around base?" Bobbi offered. "I know just how easy it is to get lost."

"Thank you," Melinda repeated. "I'd like that."

XXX

Skye approached Coulson's desk warily. The man looked worse than he had the day before, if that was even possible. He didn't even bother to hide the marks carved into his desk. 

"You've been working with May," he began. 

"I have," Skye agreed nervously. 

Coulson stood slowly. He grimaced as if his muscles ached. Within the past year, it looked like he had aged ten. Truth be told, they all did. Still, Skye worried about him. 

"I don't think we should bring her in on this," he continued. "She's under a lot of pressure, and I don't want to add any more."

Skye studied his face for a moment, trying to determine if he spoke with actual concern for May's wellbeing or fear of his secret getting out. "She's worried about you," she said. "Keeping her in the dark won't do any good."

"She needs to recover," Coulson insisted. 

"She needs to feel useful," Skye shot back. 

Coulson paused, staring at Skye in surprise, though she didn't know why. It wasn't as if it was unusual for her to argue. She wasn't sure why he didn't expect it by now. 

"Look, I know this is hard on her, but she's coping better than anyone could have expected. And she's still an agent. She needs to help."

"That's not your call," Coulson responded firmly. 

Skye sighed and lowered her head. "Alright, sir," she conceded, too exhausted to keep arguing. 

"There's something else I need to talk to you about," Coulson started, his voice returning to normal. His eyes darkened, betraying his emotions. 

Skye nodded, mentally preparing herself for the worst. "Lay it on me."

"We lost contact with one of our safe houses. I need a small team to go and check on it."

Skye nodded again, biting at her lower lip. "And you want me to be on it."

"I want to send you and Bobbi," Coulson confirmed. 

"When am I leaving?"

"Tomorrow morning"

XXX

As hours passed, Melinda couldn't keep her mind off the alien drug. She paced around the base, trying to wrap her mind around things. Everything would be easier if she could only remember. Soon, she was wracking her brain, trying to force herself to remember. As hard as she tried, she couldn't. 

After a while, she locked herself away in her bunk. She couldn't handle the stares and the hushed voices as she walked by. All they did was remind her of what she was trying to forget- that she couldn't remember. 

Melinda was doing her best to keep going, but it was getting harder to pretend that this was just a bad dream. She didn't recognize her own friends, and she was powerless to help them because she didn't know what was going on. Bobbi told her what she knew, but it wasn't enough. Something was wrong with Coulson, her best friend, and she needed to help. 

Suddenly, she was struck by an idea. It was a risk, but she needed to talk to someone who had all the details yet suffered no consequences from telling her. 

Deciding on her course of action, she began to move. Now walking with purpose, the stares bothered her less as she walked passed the lab. Luckily, Bobbi had shown her where they kept Ward so she wouldn't find herself there on accident. 

Once entering his room, she descended the stairs quickly and grabbed the tablet off the chair. She pressed a button, bringing down the wall between her and the prisoner. The man that stood with his back turned to Melinda looked nothing like she expected. Even without seeing his face, she could see the calmness in his muscles. He lacked the exhaustion that the agents held themselves with. 

"I knew you would come," he began. "I've been wanting to tell you abou-"

Ward turned and froze, his mouth still hanging open. 

"You were expecting Skye?" Melinda asked. 

"May?" he squeaked, looking at her warily. 

She nodded, taking a step closer. 

"They wouldn't send you if something weren't wrong," he muttered. 

"I need you to tell me about the alien drug," she told him. 

"I've told Skye all I know," he said, frowning. "What happened to you? You're acting different."

"Nothing happened to me," she replied, straightening herself. 

Ward squinted at her, causing her to shift uncomfortably. "You don't even recognize me," he realized. "HYDRA took your memory, didn't they?"

Melinda glared at him, refusing to answer. 

"I told Coulson, I'll only talk to Skye."

"I'm here about Skye," she said, knowing how she would play him. 

His eyes lit up in concern. "What's wrong? Is she ok?"

Deep in the pit of Melinda's stomach, she could feel jealousy bubbling. She shoved it down, focusing on the problem at hand. Shaking her head, she replied, "I need you to tell me everything you know about the alien drug."

"Has she started carving?" he asked. 

"Yes," Melinda answered, worried by his response. "Coulson won't tell me anything, but I can help her. Why is she carving?"

"When someone is injected, the drug puts these images in their mind, and they obsessively carve them out. Once they start, they can't stop."

"Skye was injected?" Melinda questioned. 

Ward nodded. "After being shot in the stomach, it was the only way to save her life." His face darkened at the memory. 

Melinda pushed her own worry to the side and continued. "Was Coulson?"

Ward nodded again. "I gather that he's carving too."

"How can we help them?"

Ward folded his arms and leaned backwards. His eyes clouded over as he thought. "I don't know," he finally answered. "That drug turned Garret into a madman."

"He was HYDRA?" Melinda asked. 

"Sort of," Ward answered. "Though in reality, he only served himself."

After a long pause, he continued. "There is a man who can help, but I can't say anything more. I need to talk to Skye."

"I understand," Melinda responded. She pressed a button on the tablet and brought the wall back up. She also needed to talk to Skye. 

XXX

Skye had just finished packing when Melinda burst into her bunk. "We need to talk," she announced, sounding worried. "Are you going somewhere?"

She stood, facing May. The other women looked worried as well. Her eyes were glued to the small bag that lay on the floor. 

"Coulson is sending Bobbi and I out to investigate a safe house tomorrow morning," she explained. "What's wrong?"

"Why didn't you tell me you had taken the alien drug you're studying?"

Skye blinked in surprise. "Coulson wouldn't let me- wait, how did you find out?"

May glanced away guiltily. Skye studied her for a moment before realizing what she had done. "You went to Ward," she said. 

"I was worried," May explained. 

"I'm impressed," Skye replied with a slight smile. 

"Coulson is your source," Melinda continued. 

"He is," Skye answered. "Maybe you should come in and sit down." She sat on the bed and motioned for the other agent to join her. 

"Why aren't you carving?" May asked as she approached, sitting beside her. 

"Coulson thinks I'm an alien," Skye answered bluntly. 

May nodded, wringing her hands together. As she watched, Skye squinted in curiosity. She had never known May to have any nervous habits, but maybe she used to. She hoped that was the case, and that she wasn't developing them now due to the intense stress she was under. 

"You should talk to him," May said. "He knows someone who can help."

"No," Skye argued vehemently. "He knows lies that were fed to him by Raina."

"Who?" May asked curiously.

"Someone insane," Skye answered. "I don't know much about her besides that."

May nodded in acceptance. Thankfully, she let the subject drop. "You'll be careful out there tomorrow, right?"

"I will," Skye answered. "I promise."

The two fell into a comfortable silence, giving Skye time to study May. The other agent was still wringing her hands. She probably wasn't even aware that she was doing it. Still, Skye vowed to keep an eye out for May in case she really wasn't as okay as she pretended to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your support!


	5. What Would May Do?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The following chapter may contain more self-harm trigger warnings.

Headquarters without Skye felt much stranger. Melinda felt lost, even more so than before. Skye had left early in the morning with only a quick goodbye and a promise to be back safe, which Melinda knew as well as anyone how quickly that could go south. 

She stood in Coulson's office, trying not to let any concern show on her face. She tapped her foot nervously as she waited for him to tell her why he called her. 

"You went to Ward?"

Melinda bit at her lip nervously. "Yes," she admitted. She should have known there would be a camera. "Sorry, sir."

"I'm impressed."

Melinda paused, scrunching her eyebrows in confusion. "With what?"

"You got him to talk to you," Phil continued. "He never even said a word to me."

"Well, he's very worried about Skye," she replied. "Once I knew that, it was easy."

"So am I," Phil began. "Which is why I have to ask this. Is it true? Has Skye started carving?"

"Not to my knowledge," Melinda responded. "But if I was able to figure out you, I would know if she was."

Phil seemed to accept her answer. He sat down, looking much less worried than before. "Thank you," he said. "You can go now."

Melinda nodded. She hesitated for a moment, watching him before she proceeded. "Sir?" she asked. "What can I do?"

"What do you mean?" Phil responded. 

"To help," Melinda answered. "All the agents are busy. I can do something."

"You should rest," he replied. "It would be good for you."

Disappointed, Melinda left. 

XXX

It didn't take long to fly to the safehouse. Bobbi was an excellent pilot, and even though she flew above the clouds, she was able to quickly navigate her way to the tiny cabin in the French countryside. As soon as they landed, Skye unbuckled and jumped out of her seat. She touched her gun at her side, reminding herself it was still there. 

"You nervous?" Bobbi asked from the cockpit. As she turned everything off, she glanced back at Skye. 

"Is it that obvious?" Skye joked. 

Bobbi smiled as she opened the ramp. "You're eager. That's how I was on my first few missions."

"Who's supposed to be here?" Skye asked. "That's who I'm worried about."

"Agents Kinler and Reese," Bobbie answered. "Both male; both scientists." She met Skye at the top of the ramp. "Ready to go?"

"Ready," Skye agreed. Her stomach felt jittery. She just wanted to get into that safehouse. 

Bobbi nodded and moved forward, drawing her clubs. Skye followed close behind with one hand on her gun. The horizon was clear. The only sound was the wind against the grass. Following Bobbi still, Skye crossed the field to the cabin. 

"It looks unimpressive, but it's reinforced with steel," Bobbi explained. "Breaking in wouldn't be easy."

"Look," Skye exclaimed softly, pointing to the door. "Scuff marks."

"Someone must have tried to break in," Bobbi agreed. She slid her card through the slot by the doorknob, unlocking the door before returning it to her pocket. 

Bobbi opened the door and walked in slowly, her hands gripped tightly around the clubs. Skye followed behind her, drawing her gun in front of her. She strained her ears but heard nothing. 

"Kinler? Reese?" Bobbi called out. "We're with SHIELD. You're safe now."

Her voice echoed through the house with no response. The two agents split ways. Skye traveled through the kitchen, looking for any sign of the scientists. She opened the cabinets and checked under the tables, but she didn't see them or any sign of a struggle. 

The light on the wall caught her attention. She walked towards it, wondering why it felt so off. As she looked around, she couldn't tell what window it came from. She followed it with her eyes, tracking it's source to the light behind the fridge. 

"Bobbi, come look at this," she called out. Skye returned her weapon to her holster and ran to the fridge. 

"What is it?" Bobbi asked as she entered the room. 

"Help me move this fridge," she requested. 

Working together, the two agents were easily able to maneuver the large fridge away from the wall, revealing a rectangle hole that looked like it was made from some kind of blowtorch. "I don't think our scientists are still here."

"Or their captors," Bobbi agreed. Bending down, she stepped outside. "There's tire marks here. We should follow them."

"I'm right behind you," Skye replied. "Let's get our scientists.

XXX

After a few hours of doing nothing, Melinda felt like she was going crazy. She paced back and forth while scratching at her arms, trying to settle her mind down. Images of Katya kept swirling through her head. Melinda blinked hard, trying to erase it. The guilt weighed too heavily on her. 

She lunged for the bathroom sink like a madwoman and turned the hot water on. Furiously, she scrubbed her hands. Every time she looked, she could see Katya's blood. No longer thinking rationally, she just knew that she needed to get it off. 

Minutes passed, and red water poured down the drain, mixed with Melinda's blood. Exhausted, she collapsed to the floor. She hardly noticed the stinging in her bright red hands from the scratch marks or the heat. She cradled them against her chest as tears fell from her eyes. Once she realized what she had done, her hands started to sting. She gasped, really looking at them. It wasn't Katya's blood that covered them, but her own. 

Melinda stood and turned the cold water on. She waited a moment with her fingertips on the faucet. Once the water had cooled, she gently stuck her hands under the flow. It stung, but the cold was also a relief to her burning skin. 

She dried her hands off with a rag and began her search through the mirror cabinet. To her relief, she found a roll of bandages and a tube of antibiotic cream. She opened the cream first and poured a generous amount into her palm. Quickly, she rubbed it over her scratches, ignoring the sting. When she was done, she wrapped her hands with the bandages to help them heal and keep them out of sight. 

In order to make sure no one asked, Melinda located her gloves and slipped them on. With her hands fully covered, she walked back into the bathroom and grabbed another rag. After drenching it in cold water, she dabbed at her face to return it to it's normal color. 

Satisfied with her appearance, she snuck out of her bunk and quickly walked down the halls to the lab. Now, she needed to keep herself calm by any means necessary. She had an idea, but it was strange to her. 

Luckily, the lab was empty. Melinda hurried to the computer and pulled up the SHIELD database. She entered Skye's name, and a picture of her came up. Her hair looked a little different, but her eyes held the same look as her Skye. Melinda smiled fondly.

"What'cha doing?"

Melinda jumped and exited out of the screen as fast as she could. "N-nothing," she stammered, whirling to face Jemma. 

"It's alright," Jemma replied with a shrug. "I'd be reading up on us if I were you too."

"Right," Melinda agreed awkwardly. 

"You're worried about her aren't you?" Jemma asked. Melinda opened her mouth to respond, but Jemma continued. "You don't have to explain. I know that look. I worry about Fitz when he's out, and I know you care for Skye."

"Yeah," she replied.

"How about you help me work?" Jemma suggested. "It'll take your mind off of things."

"Thanks," Melinda responded as Jemma handed her a scalpel. 

XXX

Skye had no idea how long they had been walking for, but it felt like hours. The landscape had changed from grassy fields to large trees that blocked out the sun and wet mud. Skye walked slowly and carefully, keeping her feet along the tire grooves. 

"They turned here," Bobbi called from a few feet in front of her. 

Skye nodded, quickening her pace slightly to catch up. She turned to see what Bobbi was staring at. In the middle of the woods, a large, steel garage door loomed in front of them. 

"It's not a HYDRA base," Bobbi observed. 

"It looks more like a storage unit," Skye agreed. 

The door was connected to a metal cube that looked large enough to hold a few vehicles. Skye squinted as she spotted the control panel to the left of the door. 

"No doubt we've already been seen," Bobbi said. "We may as well save the scientists while we're here."

"What's the plan?" Skye asked. 

"Something along the lines of poking it with a stick," Bobbi responded, walking forwards. She pulled out her baton and smashed it into the control panel while Skye watched in horror. 

"What are you doing?" she demanded. 

"There's a camera. They've seen us. There's no point in stealth now."

A heavy click rang through the air, followed by a blaring siren. Skye covered her ears and ran towards the door. Bobbi beat her there, heaving the door open a few feet. Skye slid under and took the door, allowing Bobbi to crawl through. She dropped the door, letting it slam to the ground, surrounding them with darkness and silence. 

"How did you know that would work?" Skye asked. 

"I assumed that if I broke the panel, the door would unlock in case anyone in HYDRA needed to get inside."

"Now we just need to hope no one's home."

"Help us," a new voice interrupted. 

"Kinler? Reese?" Skye called out. 

"Here," two voices answered in unison. 

Bobbi and Skye stumbled through the darkness, feeling their way around HYDRA's vehicles to the back of the garage. "Ow," someone muttered as Skye's foot accidentally found someone's leg. 

She kneeled in front of the scientists, her hands finding the rope that tied them together. Working with Bobbi, the two agents pulled it off the scientists. "We need to go," Bobbi said as they helped the scientists to their feet. 

Before they could move, they heard a heavy groaning sound as the door opened and light poured into the room. Skye only saw a brief amount of fear in the faces of the men in front of her before she turned around, gun drawn. Beside her, Bobbi's fists were tightly gripping her batons. 

Five HYDRA agents swarmed around them with large guns pointed directly at them. "Drop your weapons," one announced with a booming voice. 

"What do you say?" Bobbi whispered. "Surrender or fight?"

Just as May had taught her, Skye drew in a few deep breaths. 'What would she do?' she thought to herself. There were only five agents. It would have been easy for May, but she wasn't May. 

Of course, May wasn't May either. Now, May was vulnerable, but more importantly, May needed Skye, and Skye needed to fight for May. 

She gently pressed her finger against the trigger with her mind made up. "We fight."


	6. Fight

"What's this?" Melinda asked, looking at the hunk of metal resting on the table. 

"A piece of HYDRA technology," Jemma responded. "We don't know what it does yet though."

"Is it safe?"

"That's what the gloves are for."

Not feeling very reassured, but still needing something to do, Melinda pushed her scalpel passed wires. "It looks like a drone," she observed. 

"It does," Jemma agreed. "But we haven't been able to find a camera."

As Jemma poked and prodded, Melinda let her mind wander back to Skye. She knew how dangerous field work could be, and she couldn't help but be worried. Skye grounded her, and she didn't know if she could handle it if she didn't come back. 

A red light caught Melinda's eye, and she moved to poke it with her scalpel. "What's that?" she asked. 

Working with Jemma, the two cleared the wires and broken bit of material to uncover a microphone. Jemma cut the wires, and the red light went off. "Has HYDRA been listening to us this whole time?"

Jemma's face paled. "It seems we fell right into their trap."

"What did they hear?" Melinda asked worriedly. 

"Bobbi was around it when she told me about the mission she was going on with Skye."

Melinda turned and ran. 

XXX

Skye was able to shoot down two before taking a bullet to the arm. The pain was agonizing, but she managed to shoot down the agent who shot her. Behind her, Bobbi had two on the ground, taken out with her clubs. "You're bleeding!" she called out. 

"It's just my arm," Skye assured her. She ripped off a bit of her shirt and wrapped it around the wound. "There will be more coming. We need to go." 

Bobbi nodded and turned back to the scientists. "Are you two hurt?" They both shook there head. "Let's go."

Bobbi led the way back through the woods with Skye and the two scientists close behind. They stayed close to the tire tracks so as not to get lost, but Skye was on high alert, listening for the sound of any approaching HYDRA agents and looking over her shoulder. 

As they walked, Skye wondered about May and hoped she was doing ok. For someone who had lost their memory, she was doing surprisingly well. No one would be surprised if she had a meltdown, but she kept herself calm and collected for the most part. 

Now, Skye was focused on making it back to her. She swore to help her through this difficult time. She couldn’t even imagine what it must be like to wake up and suddenly lose seven years of her life. Skye tried to imagine if she had been the one who had woken up with erased memories. Seven years ago, she was still a hacktivist. To find out that she had joined with SHIELD, the enemy, would bring her entire world down. 

“There’s the plane!” Bobbi shouted as both the plane and cabin came into view. 

“Come on,” Skye urged the scientists, breaking into a run. She heard bullets firing at her from the woods. “Go!” she shouted, drawing her own gun and firing at her hidden assailants. It worked. Looking to make sure that everyone else had made it safely on the plane, Skye turned and sprinted towards it, hearing bullets whizz passed her ear and land near her feet. 

Once inside, Skye waisted no time in closing the door. Bobbi started up the jet, and Kinler and Reese sat down and buckled themselves in. The quinjet took to the skys. Skye made her way to the cockpit, sitting next to Bobbi. “That was too close.”

“I agree,” Bobbi replied. “They knew we were coming.”

“But how?” Skye asked. 

“Maybe it was just luck on their part. Or maybe we have a mole.”

XXX

Melinda’s feet knew the way to Coulson’s office. As she ran, other agents stared oddly at her, but she had bigger priorities. She needed to get to Phil and warn Skye. 

What would Melinda do if something happened to Skye now? She had no idea. She barely knew the other agent, but she already cared for her deeply. It had to be her stolen memories trying to resurface. 

When she reached Phil’s office, she banged on the door mercilessly until it opened up. A look of concern was on Phil’s face as he took in Melinda’s flushed face and out-of-breathness. “Melinda?” he asked softly. “Is everything alright?”

“No,” Melinda responded between pants. “You know that drone Jemma’s been working on?”

“Yeah, what about it?” Phil asked, his brow furrowing in confusion. 

“It has a listening device in it. HYDRA knows about Skye and Bobbi’s mission.”

An untrained eye might not have noticed the fear in Phil’s face, but this was Melinda, his best friend. She could read him all too easily, and the fact that he was scared scared her. 

“We need to warn them, if we’re not already too late.”

Melinda’s stomach rolled with anxiety as images of Skye hurt filled her head. She couldn’t bare to lose the other agent; not now. Skye was her anchor, and Melinda felt herself floating away. 

Phil hurried back to his desk and turned the com link on. “Skye? Bobbi? Come in.”

“Agent Skye here, we have the scientists.”

The voice on the radio made Melissa collapse to the floor with relief. 

“Thank God,” Phil replied. “Did you run into any trouble? HYDRA knew you were coming. They’ve been spying on us.”

“Hmm, well that would explain the ambush,” Skye replied nonchalantly. 

Melinda’s heart skipped a beat. Ambush? Was Skye okay? Was she hurt?

“Glad you got out of there safe,” Phil replied. “Are our scientists okay.”

“A little shaken,” Bobbi answered. “But they’re okay. You should prepare medical. Skye got shot in the arm.”

Melinda made a choked noise. Skye was hurt, and she hadn’t been there to protect her. 

“Will do,” Phil replied. “We’ll see you soon.”

Melinda stood and brushed herself off. With a shaky voice, she said, “I wanna go back into the field.”

Phil looked up in shock. “But- your memories! Are you sure you’re ready.”

“I’m certain,” Melinda responded. “I need to be able to protect my team.”

“If your certain, I’d be happy to put you back into field work,” Phil said. “Just, be careful, okay?”

Melinda nodded. “I will be.”

XXX

“So,” Bobbi said, turning her attention to Skye. “How’s May doing?”

“Honestly, she’s doing surprisingly well for someone who’s had seven years of memories temporarily erased,” Skye replied. “If it were me, I would be totally freaking out.”

“Same,” Bobbi agreed. “I can’t imagine waking up one day and realizing everything I know is gone.”

Skye considered this. Before Bahrain, Coulson had told her that Melinda had been warm, and now Skye was seeing that side of her. Their relationship had completely changed, and Skye couldn’t help but feel guilty that she liked it. Skye liked to feel needed, and she cared deeply for her former trainer. 

“You must care about her a lot,” Bobbi said, watching the storm pass over Skye’s face. 

“I do,” she said. “The whole team’s like family to me.”

“But there’s something deeper there,” Bobbi continued. “Something special that only the two of you have.”

Skye blushed and smiled. It was true that she had a special kind of attachment to Agent May. She couldn’t describe it, but she felt it, especially when the two of them were alone. It was as if Skye’s entire world stopped spinning and May was the only thing that mattered. 

“What’s our ETA?” Skye asked. She was anxious to get back to May and make sure she was okay. Plus, her arm hurt like hell, and she wanted it treated. 

“About thirty more minutes,” Bobbi replied. 

Skye unbuckled her seatbelt and move to the back of the plane. She sat across from the scientists. “You guys aren’t hurt?” she asked. 

“No,” Reese replied. “They had us captive in that dark room tied together, so other than a little rope burn, we’re fine.”

Kinler smirked. “Honestly, you should be worried about yourself. You’re the one who got shot.”

Skye laughed. “Yeah, I suppose so,” she replied. 

“Listen,” Reese said. “Thank you for coming to save us.”

“Did you know it was going to be a trap?” Kinler asked. 

“No,” Skye responded. “Did you?”

“No,” Kinler said. “They kept us in the dark, literally and figuratively.”

Skye nodded. “We’re almost home,” she said, noticing the way she had easily called the base home. It felt completely natural. After all, SHIELD was her family. 

‘I’m coming, May,’ she thought.


	7. I’m Not Used To Being Loved

Melinda was waiting by the railing for the quinjet to land. Her heart pounded inside her chest. She needed to see Skye for herself. Skye was hurt, and Melinda wasn’t there to protect her. When the roof opened, Melinda gripped the rail so tight that her knuckles whitened. 

The jet landed, and after a moment two men came stumbling out. Melinda couldn’t handle it anymore. She ran down the stairs just as Skye was coming out, awkwardly holding her bloody and bandaged arm. “Skye!” Melinda exclaimed, running forwards to hug her, taking great care to avoid touching her injured arm. 

“It’s good to see you too, May,” Skye replied, holding onto her tightly. 

“We need to get you to medical now,” Melinda said, grabbing Skye hand and dragging her towards the door. 

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Skye responded, jogging a few paces to keep up with Melinda’s urgent pace. “It’s just an arm wound.”

“That you bandaged with your shirt,” Melinda shot back. “Do you want it to get infected?”

“It was the best I could do at the time,” Skye replied defensively. 

Melinda stopped, turned around, and faced the other agent. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I just worry.”

“Yeah, like mama bear,” Skye joked. 

Melinda bit at her bottom lip gently. Her feelings for Skye were not maternal in any way. What they were, Melinda had no idea. Platonic? Romantic? She would figure it out later. “We still need to get you to medical.”

“Right,” Skye said. She allowed Melinda to take her hand again and this time, gently lead her to the med bay. Jemma was already there with a bed prepared for Skye. 

“Come sit,” Jemma ordered. 

“Yes, mother,” Skye joked under her breath. “Is everyone trying to mom me today?”

Jemma did not look too amused. “There’s a bullet in your arm, Skye. It’s not supposed to be in there.”

“Alright!” Skye said with a laugh, sitting down on the bed. Melinda wondered how it was that Skye was able to take everything so calmly. Nothing seemed to phase her. She was fearless it seemed. 

Jemma undid Skye’s makeshift bandage, and Melinda got a first look at the wound. She had to turn away, unable to watch Jemma work. That was her Skye, and she had gotten hurt because Melinda hadn’t gone on the mission with her. She almost lost Skye; it was almost like Bahrain all over again. 

A sob wrenched it’s way out of her throat. She couldn’t breathe. She inhaled fast and heavy, but her lungs continued to burn. She crumpled down to the floor, sobbing and hyperventilating. 

“Jemma, she’s having a panic attack. Forget my arm, I’ll finish stitching it up myself, just go help her,” she heard Skye say in the background. 

Suddenly, Jemma was sitting on the floor next to Melinda with an arm around her shoulders. “Melinda, I know you’re scared. But right now, I need you to match my breathing. Do you think you can do that?” Jemma asked. 

Melinda nodded and tried to match the other girl’s steady breathing. She squeezed her eyes shut, but all she saw was Skye’s bloody arm. She opened them quickly, hyperventilating again. “Melinda, I need you to focus,” Jemma said. 

“It’s my fault,” Melinda sobbed. 

“What’s your fault?” Jemma asked. 

“I wasn’t there to protect Skye,” she confessed. 

“Listen to me,” Jemma said sternly. “Skye’s a trained field agent, and she doesn’t need anyone to protect her.”

Melinda nodded, her breath evening out. Skye was tough. She was going to be okay. And next time, Melinda would be there. 

“You okay?” Jemma asked. 

“Yeah,” Melinda replied, blushing. She was embarrassed to have let the other agent see her so weak. 

Jemma turned around, and her brows furrowed. “What’s wrong?” Melinda asked, turning around to see for herself. 

Skye was gone. 

XXX

As soon as she had heard May’s confession, Skye had hightailed it out of that room, thankful that the other agents were too busy to notice.

She hadn’t realized just how deeply May cared for her, and it freaked her out. She wasn’t really used to being cared for, after all she was an orphan. SHIELD had become her family, but it was different. She had never let anyone too close in case it hurt when they inevitably left. She was starting to realize she had made a mistake by essentially becoming May’s caregiver. The other agent was too close now, and Skye didn’t know how to handle it. 

Last time she had gotten romantic feelings for another agent, he turned out to be a Nazi. Skye groaned and rubbed her hands over her face. What did she do now?

Somehow, she found herself in the locker room. She didn’t need anything from her locker, but she needed to be alone to think. She sat on the bench and buried her face in her hands. Her arm still ached, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as her heart. She cared for May. That much was certain. 

She remembered that night when she fell asleep in May’s bed and how natural it felt. Was that a sign? Was she catching feelings for Melinda May? 

The longer Skye thought about it, the more certain she was that her answer was yes. Somehow in her self-appointed position as May’s caretaker, she had caught feelings deeper than friendship for the other agent. Melinda had always been there to protect Skye, she had trained her with such gentleness, and now she was blaming herself for Skye’s wound. 

So, did the other agent have feelings for Skye? That part seemed plausible. But would she still have those feelings when she got her memories back? Skye wasn’t so sure. 

Just then, she heard footsteps approaching. She looked up to see Bobbi, entering her locker. “You look worse for wear,” she commented. 

“I feel it too,” Skye muttered. 

Bobbi set her clubs into her locker then sat down on the bench next to Skye. “You were fine earlier, so something must have happened just now. What is it?”

Skye decided to spill everything. “I have feelings for Melinda and I think she may return those feelings.”

Bobbi blinked. “Wow,” she commented. “That’s pretty intense.”

“Yeah,” Skye replied. “And now I don’t know what to do.”

“Well,” Bobbi began, “I may not have had the best relationships in my life, but you know what? I don’t have any regrets. So if you want my advice, go after her.”

“You really think I should?” Skye asked. 

“I do,” Bobbi answered. “Trust me, regret doesn’t hurt nearly as much as a what-if.”

“Thanks,” Skye replied, standing. She had made up her mind. She was going to find Melinda. 

XXX

Melinda stood alone in her bunk, crying softly. Her feelings must have scared Skye away. It was the only explanation. Why else would Skye have run away so suddenly?

Over the past few days, the agents had gotten extremely close. Apparently, it was too close, because she freaked Skye out, and now she was completely alone. 

She cried hard, burying her head in her hands. Damnit, she had needed Skye, and now she had ruined it. 

A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts. Quickly, Melinda used her shirt to dry her face. She sniffled once then straightened her back, ready to face whoever was on the other side of that door. 

When she answered the door, she was surprised to find Skye standing there, looking disheveled. “Skye?” Melinda asked hopefully. 

“Yeah, can we talk for a minute?” the other agent asked. 

Melinda felt her heart sink. “Yeah, come in,” she said, preparing herself for the worst. Fresh tears were already starting to gather in her eyes. 

“Listen...” Skye began. “I-“ she broke off. 

“What is it?” Melinda asked, taking a step closer. 

Skye closed the distance and captured Melinda’s lips with her own. Melinda grunted in surprise, but she pushed back into the kiss. Skye grabbed her hair and pulled her closer. Melinda obliged, wrapping her arms around Skye. The other agent’s tongue pushed her way into Melinda’s mouth, and she moaned with pleasure. 

That seemed to be all the fuel needed to ignite Skye’s fire. Suddenly, the agent roughly grabbed Melinda’s hips and pushed her backwards, into the bed. Melinda sat, and Skye continued to push her backwards until Melinda was lying down and Skye was straddling her hips. 

Skye bit her bottom lip and pulled, eliciting another moan out of Melinda. She was propping herself up with her elbows, bent over Melinda, who was fighting to catch Skye’s lips again. Skye obliged, pressing down harder. Melinda grabbed Skye’s hair and pulled her all the way down. Skye moaned, and it was the sweetest sound Melinda had ever heard. 

Skye pulled away, grinning devilishly down at Melinda. “Well, who’d have thought we’d end up here?”

“Definitely not me,” Melinda replied, dazed. 

“Were you crying?” Skye asked, concerned. 

“I... uh... yeah,” Melinda admitted. 

Skye moved so that she was sitting next to Melinda on the bed. “What’s wrong?”

Melinda wiped at her face again, not sure where to begin. “In the medical room, I thought my feelings had scared you away.”

“I’m not used to being loved,” Skye admitted. “So actually, yeah, this is completely terrifying.”

“And the last person who loved you... was Ward?”

“Yeah, exactly,” Skye said. 

Melinda understood Skye’s struggle. It was hard for her to believe she was even deserving of Skye’s love after what she had done to Katya. Melinda was a monster, but maybe in their own way, each agent was. They were all killers here; maybe that’s why they understood each other so well. “Did you love him back?” Melinda asked gently. 

“You mean before I found out he was a Nazi?” Melinda nodded. “Yeah, I think I did.”

“I’m not a Nazi,” Melinda promised. 

Skye laughed. “Yeah. I know.”

 

XXX

Skye walked down the hallway feeling much lighter. Kissing Melinda had lifted a weight off her shoulders. She had strong feelings for the other agent, and judging by the sweet sound of Melinda’s moaning, the other agent had strong feelings for her too. 

The agent made her way to the training room, where she found Bobbi. “Hey, Bobbi,” she called out. 

Bobbi turned her attention from the sandbag she was pulverizing to Skye. “What’s up?”

Skye smiled and blushed. “I just wanted to thank you for the advice.”

Bobbi winked at her. “I see everything went well.”

“Yeah,” Skye said. “But I’m still scared.”

“Why?” Bobbi asked. 

“Melinda’s not the same person as she is with her memories. What if she doesn’t like me anymore once she gets them back?”

Bobbi smiled kindly. “I think you’ll find that deep down, Melinda is the exact same person she’s always been. She’s just a little more open about it.”

“You’re right,” Skye said. “Thanks again.”

She left Bobbi to her training and began heading to Coulson’s office. When she arrived, the director was in the middle of carving on his wall. Skye stayed silent in the doorway, watching him. She knew there was no pulling him away when he got like this. It was a compulsion that needed to happen. He carved lines and dots, but they seemed to lead nowhere. 

Finally, he dropped the knife. “Skye,” he said. “How much of that did you see?”

“Enough to know that it’s getting worse,” Skye replied. “And why haven’t I started carving yet?”

“I have a theory,” Coulson stated. 

“Great,” Skye replied. “And that theory is...?”

“You already had the alien blood inside you.”

“WHAT?” Skye shouted. “You- you mean like- like I’m an alien?”

“That’s one possible theory, yes.”

“No,” Skye said firmly. “Okay, first of all, you do not just tell someone that you think they’re an alien.”

“It’s not the only possibility,” Coulson replied calmly. 

“Well good then,” Skye said. “Let’s hear the others.”

Coulson was silent for a moment. “Yeah, I’ve got nothing.”

“Oh my god,” Skye said. “I cannot believe you think I am an alien.” She paused. “Oh my god, Coulson, what if I’m an alien.”

Coulson sighed. “Then you know what you have to do.”

Skye nodded. “I’m going down there now.”


	8. Alien

Everything was dark. Melinda opened her eyes, but she couldn’t see anything. Where was she? Hesitantly, she took a few steps forward. Her footsteps echoed loud on the floor beneath her. 

“Melinda,” a voice called, and Melinda froze in terror. She knew that voice. 

“Melinda,” she said again, and Melinda whirled around, trying to find her. 

“Where are you?” she called into the empty blackness. 

“Right here,” the voice echoed, and suddenly Katya was standing beside her. 

Melinda screamed and backed up as quick as she could. “Why are you here?” she asked. 

“I need a new mom,” Katya replied with a giggle. She stretched out her hand towards Melinda. “Just touch my hand.”

“No,” Melinda said firmly. “You killed all those people.”

“No, Melinda,” Katya replied with another giggle. “You killed all those people.”

Suddenly, there was a hole in Katya’s chest, and blood was pouring out of it. “You said you’d protect me, Melinda,” Katya said, her voice becoming distorted. 

“You’re a monster,” Melinda replied, tears forming in her eyes. “I- I tried. I wanted so badly to save you.” Melinda sobbed into her sleeve. 

“You killed me!” Katya accused. 

“I’m sorry,” Melinda cried, falling to her knees. 

Katya touched Melinda’s cheek, and she screamed. 

Suddenly, she was wide awake in her bed, tangled in the sheets. Sweat dampened her skin, as well as fresh tears from her eyes. She breathed heavily. It was only a nightmare. 

Melinda struggled to remember the events that led to her passing out. She remembered Skye, sweet Skye, kissing her before she had to meet with Coulson. She had felt elated. She must have gone to lie down afterwords and fallen asleep. 

Melinda rubbed her eyes to try to dry them. She was sure that they were bloodshot red. The nightmares were getting worse. No matter what she did, she couldn’t get Katya out of her mind. 

Melinda stood. She knew who she needed to see to make her feel better. She quickly washed her face in the bathroom and exited her bunk. Luckily, the halls were empty. She moved down them as quickly and quietly as possible until she found the door she needed. 

The room was empty, but Melinda wasn’t surprised. Skye was a busy agent, but Melinda knew she’d be back eventually. She climbed into the other agent’s bed nervously. She hoped she wasn’t crossing a line, but she was in desperate need of the kind of comfort Skye provided. 

The whole bed smelled like Skye. She breathed the scent in. It was a relief to her sense. 

“You killed me!”

Melinda scrunched her eyes tight and covered them with her hands. She let out another sob. Her job wasn’t to kill kids. Katya was a mistake, she should never have been there, but that didn’t change how Melinda felt. She had murdered a child. True it was in self defense, as well as in defense of all those men she had under her spell, but that didn’t make Melinda feel any better. 

She curled up in Skye’s bed and decided to ride out the storm, sobbing into her arms. She would wait for the other agent to show up.

XXX

Skye found herself holding the tablet in her least favorite place once again. She sighed. It was better to get this over with. She pressed the button that would bring down the wall between her and Ward. 

“Skye!” he exclaimed. His eyes lit up, and Skye wanted to vomit. What did it say about her if the monster was in love with her? “There’s so many things I want to tell you ab-“

“That’s not how this works,” Skye cut him off and gave him a stern look. “You know why I’m here.”

Ward’s eyes widened in fear. “You’ve started carving, haven’t you?”

“No,” Skye said through grit teeth. She wished there was a way she could reach through the barrier and punch Ward in the face. “But you already knew that, didn’t you?”

“Then why are you here?” Ward asked, genuinely confused. 

“I’m not carving,” she said. “In fact, I’m not showing any symptoms of having been injected with Kree blood.”

“Well that’s good,” Ward replied. 

“No, it’s the worst possible scenario,” Skye almost screamed in frustration. At Ward’s confused look, Skye continued, “Coulson think I already have alien blood in me.”

Ward’s eyes lit up. “That would make sense,” he said. 

“How?” Skye shouted. “How does this make any sense.”

Ward stepped closer, almost touching the barrier. “It’s time I finally told you about your parents.”

“What about them?” Skye asked. 

“The village you were hidden in was destroyed by monsters,” he said. “But that’s just it. The monsters were your parents.”

“You’re telling me my parents were monsters?” Skye asked in disbelief. 

“You already know about your father,” Ward replied. “Is it that hard to believe your parents were part Kree?” 

“Yes!” Skye shouted. “Because I’m not an alien.”

“Skye-“ Ward tried to say, but Skye had already put the wall back up. She stormed out of the cell. She needed to rest and clear her head. 

XXX

Melinda was startled by the sound of the door being thrown open. She jumped to her feet, ready to fight off an attacker, but it was only Skye looking defeated. “Sorry for startling you,” she said. “I didn’t know you were in here.”

“No, why would you?” Melinda agreed. 

Skye closed the door much more gently. “I just came back from talking with Ward.”

“Oh,” Melinda responded. That would explain the fury in her eyes. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Skye sighed and plopped down on her bed. “Yeah, actually,” she said. “I mean, you’re reasonable.”

Melinda sat next to Skye. “I try to be,” she responded. 

“Coulson and Ward think I’m an alien,” Skye bluntly said. 

Melinda scrunched her eyes in confusion. “They what?”

“They think I’m an alien,” she repeated. “And that’s why I’m not showing any of the side effects of having alien blood injected in me.”

Melinda considered what Skye was saying. It seemed impossible, but after seeing what that kid had done in Bahrain, she supposed anything was possible. 

“That’s crazy, right?” Skye asked. 

“Crazy? Yes,” Melinda answered. “But wrong, I don’t know.”

Skye gaped at her. “Seriously?” she asked. “You believe them.”

“I think you should have Simmons run a test on your blood, just to knock out the possibility.”

“You’re right,” Skye replied. “I’ll go- wait, why were you in here?”

Melinda blushed ferociously. “I um, I fell back asleep um and I had a nightmare.”

Skye was quick to pull Melinda into a hug and plant a kiss on her forehead. “I’m sorry,” she said. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

“I-“ Melinda sighed. “I don’t think I can. I’m just not ready yet, you know?”

“I understand,” Skye said. “What can I do to help?”

“Can we just stay like this for awhile longer?” Melinda asked. 

Skye agreed. 

XXX

About an hour later, Skye was walking down to the lab. Her time with Melinda had calmed her down, but she was still fuming about Coulson and Ward thinking she was an alien. She knew Melinda trusted Coulson’s judgement, but she just couldn’t. 

“Jemma,” Skye greeted her friend upon entering the lab. 

Jemma looked up from her work and smiled. “Hello, Skye,” she said. “Is there something I can help you with?”

“Actually, there is,” she said. “I need you to test my blood to make sure I’m not an alien.”

Jemma blinked in surprise. “An alien?”

Skye sighed. “Long story short, Coulson and Ward both think I’m an alien for classified reasons, and May said I should check with you to prove them wrong.”

“Alright then,” Jemma said as she dug around in a drawer. “Have a seat.”

Skye sat down next to Jemma and watched as she prepared the needle. She wiped Skye’s arm down and gently inserted the needle into her vein. Skye watched with interest as her blood filled the attached capsule. 

“That’s it,” Jemma said, removing the needle. She stuck a band-aid where the needle was and turned to some glass tablets laying on the table. Gently, Jemma let out a drop of blood onto one of them and put it under a microscope. 

After a few silent minutes, Jemma said, “Oh my god.”

“What?” Skye asked nervously. 

“Your DNA,” Jemma answered. “It’s like nothing I’ve ever seen before.”

“Oh my god, am I an alien?” Skye asked. 

“I can’t be sure,” Jemma replied. “You may just be... enhanced.”

“Because I’m an alien?” Skye asked. 

“Calm down, please,” Jemma begged. “Let’s just talk about this.”

But it was too late. Skye had already turned and ran.


	9. Unbreakable

Melinda was lost in thought as she walked back to her bunk. She couldn’t get those gorgeous brown eyes out of her mind, looking at her with complete love and trust. She didn’t feel deserving, not after she had murdered Katya. But this wasn’t just about her anymore. Skye was a part of this relationship (or whatever you wanted to call it) too, and leaving would only hurt her. No, Melinda had to stay, forced to swallow her guilt and let her heart love. 

It wasn’t an easy task. Skye’s eyes weren’t the only ones that haunted her mind. She could see Katya’s cold, lifeless eyes too as she held her limp body. 

Melinda rubbed at her eyes, trying to wipe the unwelcome image from her brain. She focused in on Skye’s eyes. Skye loved her, so that had to mean she was redeemable. 

Did Skye love her? The agent had never said it out loud, and now Melinda wasn’t sure. It was obvious that Skye cared for her, but did that equal love?

Melinda sighed, wondering if she would ever figure it out. She opened the door to her bunk and was startled by the presence of Skye on her bed. “Skye?” Melinda asked cautiously, closing the door behind her. “What are you doing here?”

Skye looked up at her with darkened eyes that worried Melinda. She had never seen such a dark look on the other agent’s face (at least not that she could remember) and it scared her. “What’s wrong?” Melinda pressed. 

“I went down to the lab,” Skye said, and from her hoarse voice it was obvious she had been crying. “Like you said, to prove I’m not an alien.”

Melinda crossed the room to sit next to Skye. She held her hands gently and looked into her eyes. “And?” she asked. 

“And according to Jemma, I have ‘enhanced DNA’,” Skye said with a cheerless laugh. “Because I’m an alien.”

“That’s a lot to take in,” Melinda replied. If that was true though... then maybe... was it possible that Katya had been an alien too?

“Yeah, you would know a thing or two about that,” Skye said. “How do you deal with the shock?”

“I spend time with you,” Melinda answered honestly. “You are my anchor.”

Skye blinked in surprise. Then, she leaned over and sweetly kissed Melinda. “And I’ll always be here for you,” she said. “Just because I’m some kind of freak-“

“Hey,” Melinda interjected. “You’re not a freak, and I’ll fight anyone who thinks you are.”

“It’s in my DNA, Melinda,” Skye said helplessly. “My parents were monsters. There’s nothing I can do.”

“Not true,” Melinda replied. “You can choose who you want to be. And just because your parents were monsters doesn’t mean you are.”

A tear slipped down Skye’s cheek. “How do I know I’m not a monster?”

“Because you’re here,” Melinda answered. “Fighting for SHIELD. The good guys.”

Skye sniffled. “Yeah,” she said. “You’re right. You’re always right.”

Melinda scooted over and pulled Skye into a hug. “We’re gonna get through this,” she said. “I promise.”

XXX

Skye didn’t know how long she was in Melinda’s arms for, but she felt safe there. She felt safe from herself, like she couldn’t be a monster because an incredible woman like Melinda loved her. 

She realized that they hadn’t said it out loud yet. But the love between them was obvious. Still, Melinda was in a vulnerable state, and she deserved to hear it. “I love you, Melinda,” Skye said softly. 

Melinda stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head. “I love you too, Skye.” She hesitated. “There’s something you should know.”

“What’s that?” Skye asked, turning to face her. 

“You’re not the monster,” Melinda said, taking a deep breath. “I am.”

“Melinda, you are many things, but a monster is not one of them,” Skye replied firmly. 

“You don’t even know what happened in Bahrain,” Melinda whispered. 

“You can tell me when you’re ready,” Skye said. “But no matter what you did... you’re not a monster.”

A tear slid down Melinda’s cheek. “I killed her.”

“Who?” Skye asked. 

“Her name was Katya,” Melinda said. Another tear fell from her eyes. “I thought she had been taken hostage. I promised her I was going to save her. But it turned out, Katya was the one holding the soldiers and agents hostage, killing them one by one.” Her voice trailed off as a sob broke out. “It was some sort of mind-control. And I... I killed her.”

“Oh god, Melinda,” Skye gasped. She threw her arms around the other agent and held her tightly. “That doesn’t make you a monster. You did the right thing.”

Melinda was sobbing into Skye’s shoulder, and Skye let her. She rubbed Melinda’s back, letting her get it all out. Crying was healthy, and Skye kept forgetting that Melinda was reliving her trauma from seven years ago. 

Skye’s mind couldn’t help but wander to dark places. There was no doubt that in Melinda’s situation, Katya was the monster. But was she just like Skye? Was she... enhanced? Alien? These thoughts troubled Skye, and she found herself gripping on to Melinda for comfort. 

“I’ll tell you what you are, Melinda,” Skye said firmly. “You’re a victim. You’re traumatized by what you had to do. Katya was the monster, Melinda. Not you.”

Melinda sniffled. “You really believe that?” she asked. 

“I do,” Skye answered. 

XXX

Skye spent the night in Melinda’s bed. Melinda figured they both needed the comfort, warm bodies pressed together in the middle of the night. Skye mumbled in her sleep, and it was actually kinda cute. 

Melinda’s sleep was the most restful she’d had in a long time. When she awoke, she felt invigorated, ready to start the morning. But Skye was still sleeping, and Melinda wasn’t about to wake her up. 

“Melinda,” she mumbled. 

“I’m here,” Melinda whispered softly, stroking Skye’s hair. 

“Don’t take Melinda.”

“I’m safe,” Melinda replied, a little louder. “It’s just a dream. I’m safe.”

After a few minutes, Skye groaned and opened her eyes. “G’morning,” she said with a yawn. 

“Good morning, Skye,” Melinda replied. 

“Melinda?” Phil’s voice rang out over the coms. 

“I’m here,” she replied. 

“Will you come talk to me in my office?”

“Copy that.”

Melinda sighed, not wanting to move. She felt so comfortable spooning the smaller girl. It was like a puzzle that they fit perfectly into. “Duty unfortunately calls,” she said, getting out of bed. 

Skye buried her face in Melinda’s pillows. “Tell duty to piss off.”

Melinda leaned down and kissed Skye’s head. “I’ll be back.”

Feeling happier than she had since she had woken up without her memory, Melinda walked down the halls that were starting to become familiar towards Phil’s office. She knew the way by now. Hopefully, that was a sign that her memory was improving and would be returning to her soon.

She didn’t bother to knock on Phil’s door, simply inviting herself in. Phil was staring helplessly at his wall of carvings. “Melinda,” he greeted. 

“What’s up?” she asked. 

“I have a lead on a rogue HYDRA agent. I need you and Skye to track him down.”

Melinda walked over to Phil’s desk. She found a file, opened it, and looked at the bearded man inside. “Ian Whittaker?” she asked. 

“That’s the one,” Phil replied. “I want you to bring him in for questioning.”

“Shouldn’t be too hard,” Melinda said. “Besides, it’s two against one.”

“My thoughts exactly,” Phil replied. “Should be a nice, easy mission.”

“Is it a good idea to send in Skye?” Melinda asked. “She’s still recovering from being shot in the arm.”

“All our other agents are busy,” Phil replied. “I need you too to do this for me.”

“Ok,” Melinda responded. “I’ll go tell her.”

And with that, Melinda left Phil’s office, striding back to her bunk. She wasn’t surprised to see that Skye hadn’t moved an inch. “Get up,” Melinda said gently. “Duty’s calling you too.”

Skye groaned. “What is it?”

“A rogue HYDRA agent,” Melinda replied. “Ian Whittaker. Phil wants us to bring him in.”

“Let me at least put some shoes on first,” Skye joked, standing up. “I better get back to my own bunk. That’s where all my clothes are.”

Skye left, and Melinda smiled at her carefree, resilient nature. Last night, she had been worried she was a monster, but now she was joking lightheartedly. 

She changed into her uniform, ready to take Ian on. And this time, she would be there to keep Skye from getting hurt. 

Once she was ready, she met Skye at the quinjet. “Ready to hunt down our HYDRA operative?” she asked. 

“Totally,” Skye responded. 

The agents boarded, and Melinda took her place at the pilot’s seat and started the jet up. “We’ve traced him to an old SHIELD safe house,” Phil’s voice echoed over the intercom. “I’m sending you the coordinates now.”

The coordinates appeared on screen, and Melinda set them into the GPS. “Let’s go catch us a criminal,” she said, getting the jet into the air. “Looks like we’re headed to Switzerland.”

XXX

About halfway through the flight, Skye decided to break the comfortable silence. “Melinda?” she asked hesitantly. 

“Yes?” Melinda replied, sounding concerned. 

“Are we... are we in a relationship?”

Melinda hesitated for a moment. “I would like to be,” she admitted. 

“Ok,” Skye replied. “That settles it then.”

Melinda smiled widely, which caused Skye to smile. Melinda had been in so much pain since losing her memory. Skye was happy to be able to take that away. 

Skye let the rest of the flight pass in content silence. That was one of the things she enjoyed the most about their relationship; the ability to sit in silence together. It felt intimate somehow. Slowly, Skye moved in her seat so that she was leaning her head on Melinda’s shoulder. 

“You do realize nothing’s going to change once I get my memory back, right?” Melinda asked. 

“How can you be so sure?” Skye asked. 

“Because a love like this... it can’t be broken.”

Skye beamed. She loved the idea of an unbreakable love as much as she loved Melinda. Skye found herself wondering how she had fallen so fast. Perhaps it was fate that led to Melinda losing her memory, putting her in Skye’s care. The Melinda she knew had walls up too high to let anyone in. Perhaps, Melinda had needed a break from herself to give herself the opportunity to be loved. 

Melinda landed the jet outside a cabin. The door opened, and Skye hopped out, eager to catch their criminal. She approached the cabin, her mind so filled with Melinda that she forgot to be cautious until she heard the gunshot and felt the pain in her side.


	10. Off Bench

Melinda’s heart nearly stopped when she heard the gunshot. She rushed out of the jet, screaming, “Skye!”

The other agents was standing in the clearing, holding her side. Melinda could see the blood escaping through Skye’s fingers. She ran over to the other agent and knelt down. 

“He just grazed me,” Skye said hurriedly. “Go after him.”

“I can’t leave you like this,” Melinda argued. 

“There’s a first-aid kit on the jet,” Skye said. “Let me take care of myself. Complete the mission.”

Melinda was torn between wanting to take care of Skye and wanting revenge on the person who hurt her. “Go,” Skye demanded. Melinda nodded, standing up. She drew her weapon and made her way into the forest surrounding the safe house. 

She heard leaves crunching, and she fired in that general direction. She heard a grunt and the sound of someone falling. Melinda ran towards the noise, seeing Ian laying on the ground. She kicked the gun away from him. “Ian Whittaker?” she asked. 

His hand was pressed against his bloody shoulder. “Who’s asking?” he asked. 

“SHIELD,” Melinda responded. “You can come quietly or you can fight. Either way you’re coming with us.”

As soon as Melinda had finished speaking, white foam appeared around Ian’s mouth. “No!” Melinda exclaimed, grabbing him by the shoulders. He grunted in pain, and then he was gone. “Damn it,” Melinda swore. 

She checked his pockets, but he had nothing on him. She sighed and stood up. Melinda made her way back to the safe house. She checked inside, going over all his things. All she found was a box of ammunition and false IDs under his bed. She pocketed the false IDs, thinking they could be useful, then left the safe house, making her way back to the jet. 

Skye had a new set of stitches in her side and was cleaning the blood up with a damp rag. Luckily, it looked like Skye was right and the bullet had only grazed her. Melinda felt a pang of guilt. She had asked to be back in the field so she could protect Skye, but the other agent had gotten shot again. “I’m so sorry,” Melinda said. 

“What happened to Whittaker?” Skye asked. 

“Cyanide capsule,” Melinda explained. 

“Damn,” Skye swore. “Coulson really wanted that son of a bitch too.”

“He was really laying low,” Melinda said. “All I was able to pull from the safe house was a bunch of fake IDs.”

“That’s better than nothing,” Skye said. “If there’s nothing left for us here, we should head home.”

XXX

Skye pressed an ice pack to her aching side on the flight back to base. She didn’t miss the worrying looks Melinda kept giving her. “I’m gonna be alright, you know?”

“I should have been there,” Melinda responded. “It shouldn’t have happened at all.”

“Melinda, I’m the one who rushed out there carelessly. I didn’t even wait for you. If anyone’s to blame, it’s me,” Skye argued. 

Melinda didn’t look convinced. “Will it make you happy if I stay out of the field for a few days?” Skye asked. 

“Yes, actually,” Melinda responded. “You’ve got two holes in you now.”

“Alright, then I’ll do that,” Skye agreed. “Do you think it was a trap?” she asked, changing the subject. 

“No,” Melinda replied. “I think he heard the jet approaching and took to the woods.”

“Makes sense,” Skye said. “Maybe we should have landed away from the safe house and walked.”

“Maybe,” Melinda said. “Or maybe you should just wait for me next time.”

Skye was forced to look away from the intensity of Melinda’s gaze. It was an unfamiliar thing, being loved so intensely. As much as she wanted to dive right in, she was scared. Not only was she giving Melinda the power to hurt her, Melinda was doing the same without a second thought. Skye admired that about this older version of Melinda. She didn’t seem to think twice about who she let it. 

Bahrain must have built those tough walls that she was so familiar with, and Skye was still scared that Melinda was going to turn and run the moment she got her memory back. 

“What’s on your mind?” Melinda asked. It seemed that Skye would never be able to hide anything from her. 

“Our relationship,” Skye replied honestly. 

“What about it?” Melinda questioned. 

Skye sighed. “The Melinda I knew had pretty high walls,” she said. 

“And you’re scared that once I get my memory back, those walls are going to kick you out,” Melinda finished. 

“I know you said we have an unbreakable love, but I’m scared of losing you.”

“I’m scared of losing you too,” Melinda replied. “When I heard that gunshot, I could hardly breathe. I couldn’t even think straight.” She paused for a moment. “I don’t think I can leave you as easily as you fear. I’m already in too deep.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Skye questioned. 

“No,” Melinda responded. “It’s a wonderful, beautiful thing to be in love with you, Skye. I just hope you feel the same.”

“Of course I do,” Skye replied. “But this is all so new to me. It’s like sensory overload.”

“I get it,” Melinda said. “We can take this as fast or as slow as you want.”

“Thank you,” Skye replied. She leaned over and kissed Melinda’s cheek. Her side complained, but she didn’t care. 

Once the base was in sight, Skye sighed with relief. “I better get Jemma to check my side,” she said.

“I was just thinking the same thing,” Melinda replied. 

The jet landed, and Skye stood slowly so as not to ruin her stitches. “You go report to Coulson,” she said. “I’ll get checked out by Jemma.”

“I’ll come by once I’m done,” Melinda responded. 

Suddenly, Skye’s world turned dizzy, and she blacked out. 

XXX

Melinda barely caught Skye in time before she hit her head. “Skye?” she asked frantically, but the girl was unconscious. With one arm under her knees, and the other cradling her neck, Melinda ran towards the lab. 

Jemma looked up as soon as she entered and paled when she saw Skye. “What happened?” she demanded. 

“She was shot,” Melinda answered, lowering Skye down onto a bed. “She said the bullet just grazed her and stitched herself up.”

“Not again,” Jemma murmured, lifting Skye’s shirt up to see the wound. “Well, if she’s going to keep getting shot, I have got to teach her how to do a better stitching job,” she commented. “She’s probably bleeding internally. I’m gonna have to go inside. It would be better if you left for this part.”

Melinda nodded meekly and turned before she could see Jemma working on Skye. It wasn’t an image she wanted in her head. She trusted Jemma enough to know that Skye would be okay. 

She made her way to Coulson’s office, ready to report their failure to catch Whittaker, and her failure to keep Skye safe. Her heart was heavy with guilt. Skye may be a trained field agent, but she wasn’t a seasoned expert like Melinda was. 

Melinda put that thought out of her mind quickly as memories of Bahrain resurfaced. This wasn’t Bahrain. Skye was alive, and more importantly Melinda was never going to have to pull a gun on her. 

She walked into Phil’s office feeling rather somber and collapsed on a chair. Phil looked up in surprise. “Melinda,” he said. “I wasn’t expecting you back yet. Where’s Whittaker.”

“Killed himself with a cyanide capsule,” Melinda answered. 

“Damn it,” Coulson swore. “We really needed his intel too.”

Melinda retrieved the fake IDs from her pocket and threw them down on the table. “This is all we were able to retrieve.”

Phil nodded. “I’ll see what I can dig up,” he said. “In the mean time, what’s on your mind?”

Melinda sighed heavily. “Skye got shot again,” she admitted. “And now she’s suffering from internal bleeding because I couldn’t protect her.” 

“You can’t protect everyone, Melinda,” Phil said. 

“Maybe not everyone,” Melinda replied. “But her.”

“I see,” Phil responded. “This is about more than Skye, isn’t it?”

Melinda swallowed hard and did her best to remain her composure. 

“Putting you out in the field again was a mistake-“

“No, Phil, please,” Melinda begged. 

“You’re clearly not over your reawakened trauma from Bahrain-“

“I’m fine Phil, don’t do this-“

“Therefore, I am taking you off field duty until your memory returns.”

Melinda bowed her head, trying to stop the tears from flowing. He walked around the desk and up to her and wrapped her in his arms. She couldn’t take it anymore. She chocked out a sob and let the tears flow down her face. 

“I know you cared for her,” Phil said. 

“She doesn’t matter anymore, she’s ancient history,” Melinda argued. 

“But not to you.”

Melinda let out another sob. “I told her I’d keep her safe,” she said softly. 

“And now you’re trying to replace Katya with Skye to make things right,” Phil said. “But you can’t. Katya’s dead, and you need to properly grieve.”

Melinda sniffled and wiped at her eyes. “Okay,” she replied. “I can do that.”

XXX

When Skye came to, the lights were too bright. She groaned, moving to shield her eyes with her hand, which pulled on her injured side. She let out a gasp of pain, and her arm fell back to her side. 

“Oh good, you’re up,” Jemma said. “We need to talk.”

“Look, I pulled myself out of the field as soon as I realized I got shot,” Skye explained. 

“It’s not that,” Jemma said. She pulled up s chair and sat down. “Melinda came in distraught, but there wasn’t even a scratch on her, leading me to believe this wasn’t another ambush.”

“I got off the jet first,” Skye said. “I was making my way to the safe house when Whittaker shot me from the woods.”

“That doesn’t sound like you,” Jemma said, checking Skye’s stitches. 

“What do you mean?” Skye asked, an uncomfortable feeling growing in her belly. 

“You see yourself as May’s caretaker, correct?” Jemma asked. 

Skye shifted uncomfortably into an upright position. “I see myself as Melinda’s helper while she’s recovering,” she answered carefully. 

“And that’s just it,” Jemma replied. “You call her Melinda now. Not May.”

“Well, that’s her name.”

Jemma eyed her cautiously. “I’ll just be blunt with you,” she said. “Did you get shot because you were distracted by May?”

“No,” Skye argued. “Of course not.”

Jemma sighed. “You’re an awful liar, Skye.”

“Oh, like you’re any better.”

“Don’t change the subject!” Jemma exclaimed. “This is a serious matter. We can’t have our field agents getting shot because they’re distracted.”

Skye sighed. “I know better now,” she said. “I’ll be more careful next time. You see, I’m kinda down a trainer right now-“

“Alright, alright,” Jemma replied with a smile. “But you’ve got two gunshot wounds. I’m recommending taking you off of field duty until you recover.”

“Fair enough,” Skye said. 

“And no training either,” Jemma shouted at her as she walked out. “We can’t have you ripping out your stitches.


End file.
